While the holiday season should be all about love and fun, conflicts arise here and there for many couples. Obviously, shopping in stores, family celebrations, empty wallets after all that spending, the vicious cycle of tired children are all elements that do not help. Besides, this year, the effect of the COVID-19 pandemic is being felt at different levels, and couples are not spared. But how to do that this time of year is good for couples, anyway?
REDUCE SOURCES OF STRESS TO REDUCE CONFLICTS
Stress inevitably leads to conflicts. We no longer support ourselves, we support others even less and it seems that very often we dump everything on the one who shares our daily life, our lover!
Even if this year, it is not easy for everyone, for various reasons, we are trying, as much as possible, to reduce stress. We try to organize as early as possible for the Christmas and New Year’s festivities (which will be modest since no gatherings will be allowed) and we try to spend as little as possible. Are all of these freebies necessary? Are all these clothes for children too? We focus on family activities, rather than shopping in stores!
We also sort the invitations. We don’t really have a choice since the gatherings will have to take place only between December 24 and 27. These restrictions may provoke further discussion, but they will likely be beneficial for your relationship. You will have more time to yourself and you will not be spending your holiday time running from place to place. Which should contribute to the happiness of the couple!
RESPECT AND LISTEN TO EACH OTHER
Respect and listening is the key to solving many situations or preventing others from escalating. Are your wishes the same as your spouse’s for the holiday season? Did you tell him what was really important to you? And do you know what is essential for him? What is everyone’s energy level?
Take a moment to plan the holidays together. If either of you need a rest, don’t insist on scheduling activities every day. However, if a night is especially important to you, let them know. The same goes for family activities. Also, accept that you may not always be together if either of you needs a break.
ACCEPT YOUR IN-LAWS
Family meetings are not always so easy and enjoyable. Sometimes there is a clash of values, sometimes just an incompatibility of character. Despite everything, these family gatherings are important. Often, they take place only once a year and they allow cousins to meet. You have to try to see the positive in these gatherings and put a little water in your wine! However, if this evening is really painful, perhaps it is better to let your partner go alone, or conversely, to accept that he does not accompany us if it is our own family. Nothing forces the couple to be together every night, especially if it causes endless discussions afterward.
TAKE TIME TO HAVE FUN
Through all the hubbub of the holiday season, why not schedule some couple moments? A romantic walk in the snow, a candlelit dinner, we don’t necessarily need to go far or have the children babysit to have a moment of happiness together! Often, a simple break does a lot of good! Give yourself time and treat yourself! The holidays will only be more enjoyable!
Spend the Holidays, as a couple and as a family, most enjoyable!